Liz: You ever worry that Harper is going to be totally messed up when she gets older?
Greg: Why would she be?

Liz: Well, we’re kind of weird people... it stands to reason we’re going to ruin her some way or another.
Greg: It’s a given, really. And who’s to say she’s not already messed up?

Liz: I dunno... I think to officially qualify as being messed up, you have to be able to convince a therapist of it.

Greg: All he’d have to do is say “guess what?”
Harper: Chicken butt!
Liz: So basically, keep her away from therapists.